Denver Airport Awakenings
The contraction that squeezes the juice before the effervescent expansion can be tasted + the ever expanding expansiveness that produces the creative contraction; Denver airport awakenings and always remembering again and again in the process of integration.
No one to please and nowhere to need to be for an hour at least. Lest, I find myself racing rapidly through the terminal to my designated gate in the Denver airport. Fuzzy boots and alpaca beanie secured to assist my fairing of the North Dakota winds upon a late November arrival. Prepared to be warm in the biting cold, as prepared as a single carry on suitcase can get that is. A scant of sweat breaks my brow and an ache in my body from overexerting the earlier part of my day during my sacred moon time.
Deep breaths.
Don’t get me wrong, I dig a good hike with some weight on my back, though in the midst of all occurring bodily events, it finally struck mind that I am racing on a steadily moving magic carpet ~ The flat escalators that are in the big airports on the long stretches. I think you know the ones… and with an hour of time to spare. Now, usually I just runway walk down them, feeling like I’m flying with the breeze buying my hair, but today the magic carpet became something else to me; an opportunity of rest and reprieve.
All necessary being to choose to stop moving my feet.
An opportunity to stand in patience, once again remembering that my flight is not to board for another hour and there is no one external to please or meet or be. It’s just me, my bags, my boots, and my body.
In this moment of sweet surrender to the moment that is ever fleeting and ever beating, simultaneously. An opportunity to simply watch the people going to Chicago, to Colorado Springs, to Austin, to anywhere terminal B is pinging. Passing by vicariously in the slowness of time. Bringing awareness to those who rush by.
Choosing to park my feet, to let go of anxious tendencies.
All it is, was and will ever be is a choice, to savor the moment.
Why make it more complicated than it is?
Perhaps fear of not retrieving or receiving or even a fear of plain ol’ receding.
Though, in the reprogramming of my nervous system habits, I know (cognitively) that my energy will be of gain and my strength will not be lost by taking a momentary pause. Integrating the cognitive knowledge, in the body, results in subconscious habitual shifts… nervous system shifts from overdrive to feelin’ alive… which could be literally life changing for myself and the world around me via the butterfly effect.
Choosing to rest is just as important as swinging the bag around, mounting the pack, and stretching legs by leg down the tiled aisles of the port between the magic carpet because if I simply remained parked, I would be stuck at the end of the aisle in a loop. It’s a dance of breathing in to breathe out.
Taking a break outside of sleep, outside of TV, outside of social media … Ooftah, yes please!
Which leads me to a little insight I’ve been playing with the past couple of months. Going on three now, where one week of each month, I take time to be off of social media. Maybe I’ll pop in to answer a few messages, but totally relinquishing the need to post anything. By the time I return, I am totally inspired and chomping at the bit to share more magick.
I refuse to allow the algorithm to control me and my ways, though I am playing the game with boundaries that work for me and are intuitively planned versus ridged and/or impulse based. Perhaps, I have less followers or less followers see me, but my sustainable well being is more important than really, truly anything. Plus, I believe with sustainable well-being the sustainable humanity will innately find my creations and offerings… like each of you!
Everyone finds their own balance with this realm of media and is finding as things shift and mold. I encourage sovereignty, always. Yet, if needbe, I gift each and everyone external “permission” to release for the sake of internal agency.
Blessed Be + Thank you for sharing in this journey with me!
xoxo,
-Jayde-
Curiosity and Anticipation; a coping mechanism of many artists
As the leaves change and winter crisps the air, Libra season came to a blazing close and winter seems to be setting swiftly into the bones. Where vata crackles meet kapha snuggles. it’s all perfect in the grand scheme of the balanced time from the eagle’s eye.
When the leaves were yet green upon the trees, I walked upon a path along the canal each day, where I am now harvesting rich-in-red rose hips post first frost. Each day, walking on the beauty way, I found myself in daily wonderment and awe of the fact that the leaves will soon change. Each day I wondered what color each tree would bestow upon its leaves. Red, yellow, orange, sprinkles of green? The only way to know is to walk the same path as the season blows in and the embers of colour begin to glow their hymns. Near in the blink of an eye, the colours were filling the space between me and the sky and I desired so badly to drink them… and then I would laugh at the thought and ponder how I could make some sort of potion or product out of that.
Yet, then again, the wind has begun to blow, snow kisses the ground, and the trees change once again. They begin to become barren and discover space for hibernation until the juices flow again and the leaves come on hot and the blossoms begin to pop and here we are again, again, again in the fascination of it all like it never began and it never stopped.
Energy is neither created nor destroyed, then perhaps time is neither gained nor lost.
It is simply a matter of how uttlerly present one is for each and every moment. This is what creates a creator in the stakes of haters and how adversity somehow births suddenly a new earth, you see? The anticipation of the change + curiosity; a coping mechanism of many artists. A sure way to breathe. A clear path to what could be considered something of the nature of free.
To remain in curiosity and anticipation for change is a beautiful thing in the balancing act of a world that is always upon wax or within wane. A philosophy that many speak to, though also many remain slave to in ways of expression that results in anxiety and paranoia. Yet, as oversimplified as it sounds, all one must do is find space like the trees and breathe into the stillness and shake like the leaves. Somatic integration. Yes please! The answers emerge and what’s truthfully important steadily procures. There are fine lines to every which way and every side. Though, to remain in wonderment, eyes open can cure the blind, because it’s beyond what is seen, but what is felt in between. It is less of the doing and more of the becoming. It is every single moment sipped and sopping with tender attention. It is loving.
This is what makes up my imagery. This is the crux of the beginning. This is what I’ve been up to in the past several months. Turning the ship in the ocean currents and clearing my goggles of the dust. This is the sacred desire, the yearning that points me towards the making of the way that I am living. It was always intrinsic to be in the moment of life, though somehow life stated the mis-allowance and preached hustle and gathered bustles like they were made of gold plated things. Praised the hustle as if you couldn’t collect enough rings. Well, no more, good lord to purchasing time at the hustle store. Drop the swords and give me a hug. Let’s meet in the middle and cure this confusion, let’s release this dusty old bug. This planet is too abundant to perish in the fires of redundancy. What we crave… if I could speak for all.. yee, what I desire is transparency.
So before each session, I breathe life into the translations. I ask for all to come through who are clear and in the sheer alignment of curious fascination. So, as the changes occur and the letters are written word by word. We come together to co-create in these moments ever fleeting and ever weeping and ever beaming in the blissful balance of the oceanic rhythms of time worth keeping.
Aloha, I am Jayde, your esoteric poet photographer and all I can do best is to be me! ;)
Sovereign Freedom
The word “sovereign” derives from a latin word that translates as “above” — in contextual relevancy to the blog post below, utilizing the higher brain, the higher self in harmonious and balanced tandem with the lower, reptilian brain. Informed by the lower brain, yet motivated and reigned, foremost, by the higher intelligence system.
“Stop having expectations to allow more” - Dr. Zach Bush
(Mark Groves Podcast - Regenerating Health - July 23)
Fascinating are the thoughts that come to mind during conversations with loved ones. When the space is clear to communicate fluidly and all defenses are down. When the loss of words is never experienced, as a silent spacer is perceived as reverent cognitive processing. When a counter thought is simply an extension to the greater whole, theorized that we are all fragmented views from the same source. Moments, conversations, wordly exchanges such as these are when the most transformative conversations present themselves in my life.
During a conversation as such, feeling into the vibes of the overall presentation and the information behind the delivery, I began to notice an embodied difference between “freedom” and “sovereignty.” As a child, I was wild, I was sovereign in my own self until I allowed the world to tell me otherwise. Then, I became thirsty for freedom. Feening day in and day out for this “freedom” that I thought was so deep within my soul, yet so far and out of this world. I began to lean on the systems in place, while hating the systems that were in my face. I rebelled in little ways, while not disrupting what was because it seemingly opened doors and promised opportunities. This exhausted seeking for “freedom” and the way the system promised it as such was so enticing and easily deceiving because what I truly desired was sovereignty, the ultimate form of the denotation of freedom. Connotatively and energetically, the freedom we speak about has been skewed from originality and has led us to believe that free is what we are.
With sovereignty comes immense responsibility. Responsibility that I led myself to believe I was not capable of or afraid that I would fail in some way and destroy my reputation. That I had to rely on some sort of system and let loose of all responsibility to truly be “free” - that was the programming -- programming that says “If you rely on us, if you comply ‘we’ will free you. If you surrender your wild, that is when you will be free from the impulses and the wicked ways of ‘human nature.’” Well, I am here to tell you that it’s a lie. Straight up. Those days are over. It is time to reclaim our individual and collective responsibilities. To sink into the saddle of our inner medicine wombyn and men. To grow from our toddler-like resistance and tantrums pleading for freedom. We are response-able. We are able to respond instead of react.
Surrendering to freedom, to the system, to the ways of the civil-willed shall only wrap us in bondage and forever have us wanting, desperately craving more. So, we will take and take and take until we can’t take any longer, we will find our way in the dark using a flashlight instead of trusting in the wisdom of the moonlight. When will that battery die out though? When will we recognize that all we have relied upon uses transitory batteries and that which we could learn to mobilize in tandem with, the moon, is as infinite as the sun that lights our window panes? It waxes and it wanes, guiding us upon the faith of her steady love.
This transactional freedom is a quick fix and only continues to create deeper dependency, which has the audacity to breed a furthering narcissistic world.
My message from one business owner to another, is to learn the ways of sovereignty. We are all navigating this transformative time together and it is uncertain what it will look like upon cresting the horizon, so keep your vision lit, your heart fluid, and your soul grounded. Light your candle with the moon, fore she will always be there. Even upon the darkest of nights she is there, slivered and outlined. Lean into your inner knowingness that we have been strayed from, that we have been convinced to look away from. From this space of inner knowing, of sovereign beingness resides the essence, absolute of etheric co-creation upon earth.
Thank YOU for BEING YOU!
Let Shine and Be Shine,
-Jayde-